Month: July 2016

The 4th chakra~ Our sacred heart space

hear chakra

This weeks adventure I will guide you through the journey of the heart chakra. To me this space is an internal one that reveals a tremendous amount of depth and beauty. Along with memories I feel that our heart is so expansive!! It holds all of our deepest desires, dreams, hopes and fantasies. It’s such an endless vessel that can have such power to heal anything!  It’s power is endless yet it also is extremely soft and fragile.

When looking into my heart I noticed many different rooms or compartments. Each one of these compartments held various relationships, memories and encounters that I’ve had throughout my life. I noticed that I was holding onto many traumatic events regarding past relationships, many which felt unrequited. I felt what appeared to be dark-colored scar tissue in each room in my heart. When looking deeper I realized just how the rooms were completely cluttered.

This energy field felt very innocent. As if a child was managing this space. Ever since I can recall I’ve had the heart the size of an elephant and the vibrance of a puppy dog. Prancing around extending love wherever it saw fit. Well in actuality it didn’t have much discernment and would extend love to mostly the ones it saw needed it most. The catch to this dynamic is that it was trying to receive love and when the extension of my love wasn’t reciprocated than I would wind up in deep despair. This place in which my heart operates from is beautiful according to people of higher vibration yet a little shocking to those not quite there.  So it left me wondering, is it safe to be authentic regardless and in whose presence is it safe. I have spent half my life bargaining, pleading and chasing love yet mostly from those who aren’t capable. This familiar pattern is one that I’m healing presently. While looking into this dynamic I felt that there is also a huge correlation between our solar plexus and our heart center. I feel that once our inner knowing of our own truth is strong that ideally it  will help to pave a space for a stronger and  healthier heart space.

Years ago, a healer told me, ‘The reason why you keep attracting so many unloveable situations is because you’re here to learn the art of self-love in its deepest capacity.’  Well I finally understand that now! I have been making my relationship with self my first priority for the first year of my life.  I realized that as long as I’m holding on to every painful event that there’s not any space whatsoever to create beautiful experiences, especially when my heart is packed full of old boxes of grief and resentment.  I felt that I am finally  ready to let go of these deep pockets of dissatisfaction inside my heart. So that being said, I began cleaning them out. I pictured each person descending to God and said to them ‘my contract with you is now complete.’ I also recited the forgiveness mantra ‘Ho ‘Ho o’ pono pono’.  I then began dressing up the inside of my chambers with beautiful windows and pink rose quartz surrounding the areas.  I also have a beautiful angel in my life, this angel was brought to me 9 years ago. He is here to teach me many things, most importantly about what it feels like to learn how to receive and give love at the most unconditional capacity, this angel is my son Cameron,  whom I’m blessed to say  this healing has become such a motivating force.

Love, light and Aloha~

 

 

The Solar Plexus~ Valuing our intrinsic light

manipura

 

I have had the privilege to dive in to this beautiful chakra filled with so much extraordinary information.  Recently I’ve looked at the first 2 chakras,  and it wasn’t until I came upon this pivotal energy system that I felt I could write an entire book! I have been journaling daily to gather information and insights that I will be sharing with you.

When I initially took a peek inside,  intuitively I found a treasure box that was surrounded by dirt. This explained a lot for me as far as where all of my internal power was, buried!  When I took the time to dive in what was uncovered was all of my internal power that I’d abandoned. For me, I have spent 40 years of my life pleasing others, in order to feel accepted at the risk of my health and sanity.  The result was a deep resentment at myself and the world; along with chronic fatigue syndrome and a deep depression since childhood.  I was constantly walking around as a giant ball of guilt for everything and became a chronic people pleaser, putting other’s needs in front of my own. This stemmed strongly from a desire to be desperately liked and accepted.

The initial contract I had that spurred this people pleasing was a father who was a master manipulator. There was an expectation for me to meet his needs on many levels and guilt if I didn’t. The result and price paid was saying  yes when I meant no. I have overextended myself with relationships, parents, jobs and as a mother.. I felt guilty for speaking my mind and always felt I was never doing enough!  Also I never felt that it was ok to be my authentic self and to expose who I am. I became a chameleon.  I had always questioned my self in every area and was constantly doubting every decision I wanted to make. Before this medical intuitive training program I had spent thousands of dollars on psychic hotlines, asking others for what my highest good was.

The healing for me in this area I realize will take a lot of practice and self-love. What I’ve realized is that as long as we continue to say ‘yes’, those people who also lack awareness and healthy boundaries will continue to pull on our reserves. It is our job and no one elses to create our own peace. We are not here to make sure others are at peace, that is ultimately their job! I have had the honor of truly being able to listen to my body when something doesn’t feel right. It shows up for me in the gut and it feels like a ball of tension and fear along with resentment. We are all meant to break free of patterns that immobilize us and keep us from experiencing joy and internal freedom. We are meant to live out our lives according to our highest good, not others highest good. Let us allow ourselves to shine so brightly and repeat to ourselves, ‘I’m worthy of everything I desire in this lifetime and I’m free to be me’!

I would also like to end this blog with a beautiful quote:  “Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you.” Marianne Williamson. Blessing to all and honor that part of you that is screaming out ‘let me shine!’

2nd Chakra~ A creational gateway

solar plexus 2

This weeks medical intuitive class was centered on our sacral chakra and all that is stored, received and created through this energetic powerhouse! While in the  midst of checking into this center more than it’s fair share emerged for myself. Initially I was scared to even take a peak not sure of what I would find. Once I allowed myself to go inward I collected a myriad of information with in myself.

This chakra is what I  feel to be the powerhouse of all the chakras. It’s where we receive and process emotions and memories which have a strong emotional response. It’s a place of individuality, connection to self and others as well as our creativity and our sexuality. This week’s findings have been about circulating emotions in regards to all of my past relationships and my response within them. I had clear insight on old familiar patterns emerge regarding a past relationship I’d thought I’d put to rest. My awakening within this energy center was truly about discernment regarding no longer needing to test the waters of those who show up for me in unhealthy ways. Understanding how I feel around people who trigger me to question myself. Self esteem was a huge factor this week. Also learning that I can celebrate myself and rejoice in who I am is a big enlightenment for me. My final awakening was around releasing guilt in and around my relationships, whether they be ancestral or other.It’s ok for me cease connections if they don’t nourish me and knowing I deserve to choose who I feel comfortable and safe around. 

Needless to say, this center is constant maintenance and I’m grateful that I had the courage to dive in and honor myself. It takes enormous courage to want to heal and I know that it’s time to start spending more time connecting to myself without judgement. My meditation for this center was a visualization of running a beautiful faucet filled with bright orange light into my sacral field. I envisioned it swirling around much like an electric blender. Meanwhile dispersing any trapped and unwanted memories out of my field completely. Let us know ourselves more fully and become who we’re intended to be through this beautiful doorway of power!

 

Root Awakenings~Connecting to the first chakra

root-chakra-mandala-spiritual-art-by-giada-rossi-giada-rossi

Moving through my intuitive training we have arrived at the chakra system. This week we are studying the first chakra, also known as, the root chakra. This is where our sense of safety, purpose and creativity emerge from, just to name a few. There have been some  amazing discoveries I’ve uncovered within the past week that I would love to share with you. I’ve taken the time daily to connect with the health of this energy center daily for 4 days and here are some of my insights I’ve come upon within.

On Thursday I felt a deep reclamation of my inner Goddess as well as sense of vitality for life and creativity emerging with great strength! On Friday a sense of courageous endurance coupled with more creative possibilities for work started to sweep forward. I also felt a more pronounced sense of honoring my self and connection outward towards humanity. More coercion throughout my mind, body and spirit at this time. Saturdays insights were surrounding a feeling of inward stability and accomplishment. A lot of shedding of old family beliefs and ideals were prevalent.A releasing of old pillars of stability came through. This was a giant cathartic  ‘A HA’ moment of clarity for me. This day also brought me into a new job and a sense of allowing my authenticity to reign through was very empowering for me. As for Sunday well this day was also a lot of release of old stuck energy, that after some digging brought up some old fear and powerlessness around others; especially authority figures in my life. A realization that despite others need for control with me or being trampled on. I saw a scared little girl deeply wanting a sense of safety and security without feeling dominated or manipulated. After some clearing I asked guidance to healing this energy. What came up for me was that others maliciousness is truly an attack on them and their deep need to control while feeling powerless themselves. My work is to learn to not allow my energy to become so much into their space and become their dysfunction; which only perpetuates the cycle of victim hood. giving back others energy to them while keeping mine in check will help to keep a more neutral stance.

So many beautiful realizations emerged throughout this week. A deep recognition of myself has come through as well a more meaningful understanding of my work in this lifetime. What a beautiful gift we have to be able to check in with ourselves and connect on so many levels if we just take the time to honor ourselves and pay attention to our body, mind and spirit!